Self Esteem and Confidence

I still remember one of my respected superior taught me about teaching people the fundamentals – self esteem and confidence, not as much as the skill set needed like solving a mathematics problem.

The logic is simply saying that if some one has enough self-esteem and confidence, he or she will be able to master the skill that he or she needed to master. This is a basic psychological principle for me as a teacher.

It is not difficult to see around us that a lot of teachers do not understand this principle and they act more like an evaluator rather than a teacher. Especially in university, a lot of professors challenge students with very difficult questions that they need to solve by themselves and if they can do it independently, they survive the course and will be accredited with “a" degree.

This technique is not wrong but should be re-evaluated. This technique has been exercised by almost everyone at university because the students are prepared for the real world. The fittest survives and the principle is supported by this rule of nature. We see that in the history and we see how the war begins.

The history allows us to see the strength of the weaknesses as well because as the revenge or revolution matures, the mighty kingdom was overthrown.

Is this kind of the civilization we like to possess?

The is like to say that if someone’s self esteem and confidence reach the maximum limit that he or she will over-power the others and if this attitude is not toned down properly, and wait until others possess the same attitude, the situation will be and can be reversed.

Of course there are people who will not or cannot establish self-esteem and confidence as they have lost all of these when other people over-power them. These people will just listen and do what is told. The mighty god can enjoy the moment of peace. Is this a good sign?

We need to build enough confidence but not as much to get too proud to over-power others. When you do so, you can tell because you can hear the word “arrogant" attached to what you do. When you have confidence, you will have self-esteem, however, the reverse is not true. You can see that if you lose your confidence, you may still have self-esteem.

We see that when someone lose his self-esteem, he is assured the he has no confidence at all. Terrible things will happen when this happens, just watch. There is a boundary between confidence and self-esteem that we can call it “bottom line". What can be learned is to know where is this bottom line. This is very important for our human civilization to continue.

At a personal level, I will repect others up to the level of my self-esteem. I will not acquire the amount of confidence that would intrude others’ confidence and go across their line of self-esteem. I will safe-guard my self-esteem with just enough confidence because this is something that keeps me happy and alive. This is an art, a challenge for each one and others.